The Comfort of Home
by Orison
Summary: A short coda for episode 10x13 where Steve talks about those first weeks in military school.


**The Comfort of Home**

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A/N: This was not planned. At all. But a voice in my head that sounded suspiciously like Danny's wouldn't leave me alone, demanding that I (or he, in this case) asked Steve a question. So here it is. A short coda for episode 10x13 that I wrote in less than two days –which, let me tell you, for someone whose English is not their native language is a pretty big accomplishment.

As usual, would love to hear your thoughts about it.

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"Were you really bullied as a kid?"

The question came unannounced, blunt and direct like only Danny Williams could be, while they were tidying up the living room after spending the evening with Tani and Blake Tatum's dad.

Steve stilled, clutching the garbage bag in his hands a little too tight.

If it was anyone other than his best friend, he would've been seriously pissed about it.

"What? What kind of question is that? Why would I lie about that?"

Danny made a defensive gesture, the beer he was holding tilting dangerously to the side.

A few drops of the gold liquid spilled onto the carpet unnoticed.

"I don't know, it's a… it's a legit question," he replied, searching the other man's eyes for clues. "I mean, maybe you just wanted to make me feel better..."

Even after ten years of friendship, Danny knew Steve was still wary about sharing personal stuff and the surprising admission about such a sensitive topic had nearly blindsided him. He hadn't dwelled on it at first, too wrapped up in Charlie's predicament and the guilt for not realizing what was going on with his kid. But the thought had lingered in the back of his mind, and as the evening went by and the issue was resolved it had moved to front center, demanding attention.

It was serious. Life-changing important.

Danny needed to know.

"It's true," Steve said, looking away. It came out a little more forceful than intended.

"Okay." Danny sat on the couch, discarding his beer on the coffee table. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

Steve was still standing straight, unable to help the tension in his shoulders and the stiffness in his legs.

An awkward silence fell over the room.

"So was it really that bad?"

"It was. Yeah, it was." Following his friend's lead, Steve dropped the garbage bag on the floor and sat down next to him. "I was angry, I felt abandoned, I didn't know what I was doing. One minute I was a teenager in Hawaii, playing football and going through my junior year, and the next I found myself on the mainland, my mom dead and my whole family torn apart. No roots, no certainties, just my father's words ringing in my ears."

'_I'm sending you and your sister back to the mainland. You're leaving tomorrow. Joe got you into the Army and Navy Academy.'__  
_  
"Everybody else, they… they had a purpose. A goal. I just wanted to go home."

The faraway look in Steve's eyes told Danny the story was just as bad as it sounded. He leaned back, crossed his legs and waited.

"I was the perfect prey for bullies. Lost, vulnerable, alone. They caught on my weakness and took advantage of it."

"And you didn't tell anyone?"

"I was embarrassed," Steve shrugged, remembering the nights he had cried himself to sleep, always careful not to make a sound so they wouldn't notice. "Didn't want anyone to know. I stayed by myself, mostly. Tried to avoid them as much as I could. But they still managed to make those first months miserable."

Danny nodded, shifting in his seat. "What changed?"

"Joe White. He took me aside one afternoon, asked me what I was gonna do about that. I had just failed my room inspection because they messed up my bed and had to march for an hour to work off the demerits I earned. I was crushed. He said that was an opportunity. An opportunity to step outside of my comfort zone, find out who I was and show everyone that. I took his advice. I learned discipline, self-sufficiency, a new set of values. It gave me confidence. I never failed another room inspection again."The glint of pride in his eyes was hard to miss, and Danny imagined a young McGarrett with the same thousand-yard stare trying to push himself beyond his limits.

"Military school taught me how to live, work, take responsibilities for my own actions. Success was based on merits and accomplishments, so I learned to excel. Became the best soldier I could.I'm not saying it wasn't hard. It was. But I tried to see past that. See the big picture. And I did. I found a new family. Brothers that would do anything for me, that I would do anything for. I found my purpose. Something I was good at. Something I loved."

"Wow…"

Danny was impressed. Genuinely amazed how a sixteen-year-old kid whose life had been turned upside down had managed to overcome a shitty situation and actually turn it in his favor. His thoughts went to the boy sleeping in the guest room, wondering how he'd fare under the same conditions.

"What if it happens again?" he asked, voicing his concern. "With Charlie, I mean. He's not like Grace, he's…What if some other kid starts doing it to him all over again? How do I help him?"

Steve seemed to ponder the question for a while. Brows creased, he took his time searching for the right answer. "You just tell him that it's not his fault, that there's nothing wrong with him, and that you're there for him. No matter what. That's what I wished my father had told me..."

A smile curved Danny's lips.

That was good advice. He could do that.

He playfully bumped Steve's leg. "When did you become so smart?"

"I've always been smart."

"Well, that's debatable, but I guess there's a reason I let you tag along with me…"

Steve turned so he could face him, eyes wide in mock offense. "Wha—excuse me, what? You _let_ me tag along with you?"

"I did. I didn't need you there, I just _chose_ to have you around."

"Oh, you didn't need my help? You were ready to punch the guy in the face, Danny! If it wasn't for me we wouldn't be here right now, we'd be at HPD trying to talk Duke out of dropping the assault charges Luke Tatum was gonna file against you!"

Danny considered that.

It was a real possibility indeed.

"Would you, uh… would you talk to Charlie about this? I mean, with your experience and everything, maybe you can help him out more than I can."

Surprise spread across Steve's face. "Me? Sure. Yeah, of course. I will."

"Thanks," Danny replied as he got to his feet. "You know, if I was there I would've totally punched those kids in the face."

"Where?"

"Military school. I was pretty tough back in the days, people knew not to mess around with me."

Steve had no doubt his friend would've taken matters into his own hands and taught them a lesson. "I'm sure you would have. Thanks, Danny."

"You're welcome." He grabbed the garbage bag and headed towards the kitchen, expecting Steve to follow him. When he didn't, Danny went back and found him still sitting on the couch, elbows on his knees, lost in thought. "Hey, you okay?"

Steve looked up and gave him a smile. "Yeah, I am. I just… I hadn't thought about this in a long time. It stirred up some memories."

"I'm proud of you, you know?" Danny said, moving closer. "What you went through… It must've been terrible. I hope my kid turns out to be half as brave as you are."

Steve's heart skipped a beat. He nodded, ducking his head so Danny wouldn't see him try to swallow the lump in his throat.

Danny saw it anyway. "Who's the emotional support friend now, huh?" he said as he sat down again, hand settling soothingly on Steve's shoulder.

The former SEAL lowered his gaze, biting his lip as he debated whether or not to share what was on his mind.

"You know what I missed during those first few months at the Academy?" he eventually blurted out. This was Danny, his heart told him. Danny would never judge him. "More than anything else? This. The comfort of home. And I don't mean the material things, those I could have lived without. I missed the warmth, that sense of security a family gives you. The thought that you belong somewhere. My parents were who they were but I had a good childhood, and I was afraid I'd never get to experience that again."

Danny read between the lines.

_But I am now. I feel safe again. I'm okay._

"Hey, did I ever tell you about the time I got suspended because I set the janitor's closet on fire?"

Steve laughed.

He outright did.

A warm, carefree laugh.

All he'd been through in his life had led to this very moment. To him and Danny sitting on his couch swapping childhood stories.

This was safe.

This was home.

THE END


End file.
